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Fic: Regaining Sense 3/3

Chapter 3

When Jared wakes up the next morning, the first thing he becomes aware of is a warm body pressing into him. For a second there he is confused, but then the memory of last night comes crashing back.

In the harsh light of day, it's harder to ignore the sheer weirdness of the situation. Jensen letting him touch him again like that, even coming on to Jared in the first place? With the way things had been going with them, Jared almost didn't dare to dream anymore. Yet it happened, and it was even more glorious than Jared could have envisioned in his wildest dreams.

He watches Jensen's face, relaxed in his sleep, and hopes it wasn't all a big mistake that will come back to bite them both in the ass. If Jensen is going to act like nothing really changed between them, worse if he is going to regret what happened, Jared isn't sure he'll be able to take it. He is tired of watching Jensen run from them over and over and be forced to do nothing.

Watching the tiny freckles dotting Jensen's face, Jared silently resolves that this time he'll goddamn fight for what he wants. Though maybe this time, if Jensen finally will see reason, it won't even be necessary. Stranger things have happened, after all.

Luckily, Jensen is still sleeping, so for now Jared can bask a little longer in his shiny bubble of hope that for once a happy ending is in the cards for them. Carefully, he climbs out of bed, not wanting to disturb Jensen's still form. He grabs his clothes from the floor and makes his way to the bathroom.

The hot shower does a good job of loosening Jared's tired muscles, infusing him with new energy. Afterwards he takes care of the stubble threatening to eat his chin alive. When Jared once more emerges from the bathroom, he feels a lot closer to an actual a human being.

He stops short at seeing that Jensen is now sitting upright in bed, leaning against the headboard and staring at Jared. Or at least that's what it seems like to Jared.

“Morning,” Jared greets, trying to sound casual when he feels anything but.

Jensen is silent.


More silence.

Jared's heart sinks. That can't be good. “Something the matter?” He tries again.

“Nah, I just…I have been thinking.” Jensen replies neutrally.

Well, thinking can be a good thing, right? “I love you,” Jared says simply.

Jensen sighs. “I know.”

Jared bites his lip. “But?”

When Jensen doesn`t answer, Jared drops down on the edge of the bed. “Not to be pushy, Jen, but you give me all kinds of mixed signals here. I mean, last night you basically jumped me and now…” He trails off.

Jensen bites his lip. “I know. And I'm sorry. I wanted it, I…I needed it. When I realized how close I was to biting it, I got a bit crazed.” He grins self-deprecatingly.

But Jared isn`t amused. “And now you got it out of your system, we`re back to being strangers again? Is that what you`re trying to tell me?” Jared tries very hard not to yell at Jensen.

“No, This isn`t…” Jensen shakes his head, “I still do…I mean, I still have feelings for you. Last few days made that clear.” He smiles tentatively.

Jared leans forward excitedly, grabbing Jensen`s hands. Finally some progress. “Then everything will work out, you`ll see. I knew if I took this assignment, we`d…” He trails off when he realizes what he just said. Damn.

“What?” Jensen's voice is dangerous.


“You asked for this assignment?”

Jared bites his lip. This is exactly why he didn't want Jensen to know.

“Answer me, did you ask for this assignment, yes or no?” Jensen inquires again.

“Yes, but –“

Jensen balls his hands into fists. “Why? What did you hope to achieve, huh? Something like this?” He gestures towards his naked body. “You manipulated me, and idiot me even fell for it.”

“I just wanted to talk to you,” Jared says desperately. “And I tried it the normal way before, Jen. Over and over I tried, but you never even gave me a fucking chance.”

“So now it's my fault?” Jensen asks, voice full of disbelief. “Maybe you should have taken the hint and just left me alone, huh.”

Jared feels rage bubble up inside him at hearing Jensen's cruel words. “What hint am I supposed to take from last night then, Jen?” Jensen blanches, but Jared ignores him, wanting to hurt Jensen the way Jensen hurt him. He adds with deliberate crudeness. “When you had no trouble spreading your legs for me and begging for it like a bitch in heat?”

Jensen is on him in a split-second, driving his fist into Jared's face with remarkable precision, considering his disadvantage. Jared raises up his own fists to defend himself, yet despite his anger he is still mindful of Jensen, so he tries to temper his strength.

But Jensen will have none of it. He claws and scratches at Jared like a trapped animal. Out of pure chance his knee connects with Jared's groin area and Jared is forced to let go, doubling over in pain.

Jensen swings again, but overshoots and loses his footing. His hands flail in the air uselessly, searching for a hold, and down he goes. A small cry of pain escapes him as he does, and Jared can see him rolling over and cradling his left wrist almost immediately.

“Jen? You alright? Let me…” Jared tries to help Jensen back to his feet and have a look at the obviously injured wrist, but Jensen twists away forcefully.

“Don't touch me,” he spits.

Jared sits back on his haunches, hands hovering uncertainly near Jensen's biceps. Momentarily, he feels utterly at a loss of what to do. He feared this particular morning after might go badly, but not this badly. What is it with Jensen and him lately that causes him to lose his temper this badly?

This is the sight greeting Mike when he opens the door. “Holy shit,” he exclaims.

* * *

“How, I’m asking you? How can you lose a six-foot tall guy who’s blind?” Jared actually knows that ranting at the poor nurse isn’t going to accomplish anything, but at the moment he doesn't care. Jensen has gone missing from the private hospital, and all Jared can do is to keep himself from screaming his head off.

And just when a couple of hours ago things had looked as if they were finally working out for him. There is a still a faint smell of pure Jensen clinging to him. He breathes it in to calm himself, but it only served to further drive home the wrong. wrong. wrong. of Jensen not being here right now. That he isn't in reach of Jared's arms, full, sensuous lips not in the vicinity of Jared's own.

It doesn't even matter that if Jensen were here, kissing Jared would probably be the farthest thing from his mind. Like a child who is inconsolable at the loss of their favourite toy, Jared just wants Jensen.

“Agent Padalecki, report!”

Jared turns his attention from the nurse, who heaves a sigh of relief and uses her chance to quickly scamper away. Probably thankful that an obviously bigger predator had shown up to scare off the one circling her.

“Sir.” Jared snaps to attention.

“I asked you a question, Agent.”

Jared swallows. “Technically, Sir, that is incorrect, you –“

“Don't get smart with me now.” Morgan growls dangerously. “You're on thin ice as it, so give me one good reason why I shouldn't ask for your badge and gun right now.”

“I…” Jared doesn't even know where to begin explaining this mess and more importantly his part in it. Morgan warned him about the little ploy he concocted to be around Jensen, said Jensen wouldn't take it too well if he learned the truth. Well, wasn't that an understatement. “Jensen has gone missing from the hospital, Sir.”

“In case I wasn’t clear, I want you to inform me about something I don’t already know, Agent,” the SAC`s voice is deceptively soft, which usually means ´batten down the hatches, hurricane is a-coming.´

However, running for cover is sadly not an option right now. Jared straightens his shoulders. “I was just about to question the staff.”

Morgan snorts. “I could see that.” He narrows his eyes. “But what I want to know from you first is why I’m short one person, presumably guarded by finest, FBI’s finest while an agent is suffering from a concussion. And all that while the agent-in-charge of the case is doing what exactly?”

Jared bites his lip. “I...I was just down the hall while I left Mike, I mean Agent Rosenbaum, in the exam room with Jensen.”

Morgan shakes his head. “And you thought this was a good idea why?”

“Jensen made it pretty clear that he wanted me gone.” Oh, how it hurt to put it into words like that. “He was adamant that he wouldn’t submit to any examination as long as I was present.”

“Yes, Agent Rosenbaum told me as much,” Morgan says. “Of course what I`d also like to know is how actually Jensen ended up here in the first place. As I understood, his injuries from the blast weren’t that severe? Yet Agent Rosenbaum informed me he found the two of you in a very curious position when he arrived this morning. Very curious indeed.”

Jared blushes. He can just imagine how Mike described the little tableau he’d stumbled upon, with Jared half-naked and Jensen fully in the buff, sporting a possibly broken wrist. He also notices the casual slip of tongue from the SAC.

The man inquired about Jensen, not Ackles, like he normally would have done, probably not even noticing how his personal feelings had started to slip through. But wisely, Jared refrains from pointing that out, especially now. He is in enough trouble as it is.

“We...we had a fight,” he offers lamely.

A single eyebrow is raised. “Excuse me, Agent? I must have not heard you right?” Morgan’s voice is like a whip.

Jared straightens. “Jensen knows that I asked for this assignment. And he didn't…didn't react well to the news.”

“No kidding. I seem to dimly recall making you aware of that very possibility beforehand. Isn’t that true, Padalecki?”

Of course you did, you sanctimonious prig. And you know damn well you did it, too. Jared tries his best to not let this thought show on his face.

To his surprise, Morgan just seems to deflate, closing his eyes and heaving a sigh of deep frustration. “I guess pointing fingers doesn't help now.” He looks at Jared. “Make no mistake, Agent Padalecki, when this is all over, we`re over we’re going to have a long talk about professional conduct while on a case –“

“Sir, I’m sorry about the fight, I shouldn’t have let it escalate this much,” Jared tries to explain himself.

Morgan rolls his eyes. “You probably shouldn’t have fucked your charge beforehand either.”

“With all due respect...“ Jared starts to protest, but Morgan is only waving him off. “You should have respected Ackles enough to actually tell him the truth before hopping in the sack.”

“If I had, he wouldn’t have even talked to me,” Jared says miserably.

“Which would have put a real dampener on the sex part, I’m sure,” Morgan says sarcastically.

Low blow, Jared thinks. Especially since he knows it wasn’t about that.

Morgan seems to come to the same conclusion, the same conclusion because his face softens a little bit. “So tell me, what has your interrogation turned up so far?”

“I...” Jared’s shoulders slump. “Nothing, really. Nobody has seen anything or heard anything. Basically, it shouldn`t. Basically it shouldn’t have been possible.” He looks down.

Morgan’s hand on his shoulder startles him. “But sadly, it is, son. Anything is possible. And so is getting him back.”

It’s a totally unexpected moment of sentimentality, but Jared soaks it up like a sponge. He nods gratefully.

“So, get your ass in gear and organize a formal investigation.” Morgan turns to leave.

“And Agent Padalecki?” He throws Jared another look over his shoulder. “Like I said, we have to do our job. And we can’t have personal feelings cloud our judgment – no matter what. You mess up again because you can’t keep your head here, you will be off the case, and you can kiss that promising career goodbye.”

Swallowing heavily, Jared nods again. This is an honest warning, he knows that. Morgan won’t cover for Jared again. But at the moment, his career is the farthest thing from Jared’s mind. He would gladly trade it for Jensen’s well-being twice over. So he will do what it takes – either by the rule-book or off it.

* * *

When Jensen comes to, the first thing he becomes aware off is the hammering sound. Only he doesn't know if it’s coming from outside or just purely in his head, because the latter is killing him. The taste of chloroform is still in the back of his mouth, making him nauseous. His left wrist is throbbing as well. Great.

At least the doctor back at the hospital had time to finish the examination before Jensen`s kidnappers put in an appearance. Thus, Jensen knows it isn`t broken, just badly sprained.

Jensen coughs a few times, wishing desperately for something to drink. But, alas, as that is not meant to be, he thinks he might as well explore his surroundings a bit. Carefully, his right hand inches forward, over cold, rough stones covered by a soft, damp substance – moss most likely.

If he didn’t know any better, Jensen would be inclined to believe, he is in an old dungeon. But then he doesn`t know any better, and a dungeon might be exactly where he is. Of course, the chances of it are pretty slim as Dallas isn’t very high on old-school castles, and Jensen doesn’t think he's been out of it for the duration of time it would take to actually get to one. So, most likely a cellar of some kind. Good thing he doesn't need to be afraid of the dark

He rises to his feet and starts walking the length of the room, hand on the wall guiding his steps. God, what he wouldn’t give for Jack right now. Then again, who knows what these bastards would do to him, so it probably is for the better.

As far as Jensen can deduce, his ´cell’ is about twenty feet in length and twelve in width, a rather spacious prison as far as such things go. Curiously, his hands don’t encounter any breaks in the lines of stone, like, say, a door.

Either the door is very well hidden – not likely – or he has been lowered in here through the ceiling. Jensen stands up on his tiptoes and stretches out his right arm. Surprisingly, he can reach the ceiling with relative ease.

With the same methodical care he checked out the walls, he now does the same to the ceiling, coming to a halt when his fingers encounter wood amidst the stone. A trapdoor indeed then. Of course, his luck doesn't go so far as to find a latch on his side, and a few forceful bangs against the structure make it clear that the thing won't budge.

Well, that pretty much rules out the possibility of actually walking out of here. Not that it mattered much, seeing as Jensen wouldn’t have known which way to go even if he did manage to escape from the prison itself.

So, obviously he needs a plan B. Only, as much as he doesn’t like it, Jensen figures his best option right now is to stay put and wait for his captors to reveal themselves. Notwithstanding the rather unpleasant possibility that his captors just placed him here to rot, practically buried alive.

The idea makes Jensen shudder, and for a moment he can feel the walls closing in on him already, the room seeming to shrink impossibly. He mentally chastens himself. Panicking right now won’t do him a lick of good. He needs to keep a level head and think. Think, Jensen.

Suddenly he hears steps nearing from above. The steps grow louder till they stop, then a heavy squeaking noise can be heard - probably the bolts of the door being moved, and Jensen feels a wave of fresh, cold air hitting his body. He breathes it in.

“Ah, you’re awake. Comfy in there?”

The mocking voice belongs to a man, a thick South American accent coloring his speech. Jensen is pretty sure though that it’s not Vargas himself, so probably a henchman. Jensen doesn’t even bother to answer.

“Hey, if you want to, I can leave you a flashlight.” The man laughs at his own joke.

Jensen just crosses his arms in front of his chest, still not responding. He carefully listens to the voice, trying to gauge if he can maybe grab the guy and pull him in here. Of course it will be tricky with the wrist, but Jensen knows he needs to act quickly for it to work.

He is aware, he'll only get one chance, and if he blows it, the guard wouldn't fall for it a second time. Carefully, he moves closer to the source of the cold air, till he's right beneath it. Steady now.

Just when Jensen plans on making his move, he can hear another pair of steps further in the background. A voice is calling out for “Juan” to get his ass back upstairs.

The man above Jensen, the aforementioned Juan apparently, grumbles, but dutifully closes the door to Jensen's prison again, as a short banging is followed by the same squeaky sound from earlier. Steps above signal the retreat of both men.

Damn, that was close. But Jensen knows there is no way he can deal with two men at once. Sighing, he lowers himself to the floor again. At least, it looks like they don't plan on killing him outright, or it would have already happened. That might buy him time to get himself out of this dump.

Also, the fact that he can't rely on his eyes to do anything makes it likely they`ll underestimate him as well. Funny thing is, a couple of days ago, Jensen would have been in complete agreement with that.

But the explosion at the safe house changed a few things. Without his heightened sense of hearing picking up on the strange sound, it's very likely him and Chris wouldn't have made it out alive. So, all things considered, Jensen might not be as useless as he thought.

Then there is Jared, of course, though Jensen's feelings on that front are much less clear. There is no denying that the last night was one of the best nights of his life, corny as it sounds.

Somehow the sensations were so much more intense than he ever remembered – and sex with Jared had always been great – but now, with the way Jensen was so much more sensitized to touch, to physical sensation added a whole new dimension to the sex.

But finding out Jared has been lying to him like this, just when Jensen has been allowing himself to contemplate the possibility of giving it another shot, well, that doesn`t actually warm his heart.

In fact it pisses him off something fierce. Jensen never liked liars, expected better from Jared, but he is finally able to be honest enough with himself to see why Jared would resort to such tricks. Because it’s not like Jensen ever gave him a fair chance. Wasn’t in the right mindset to. So his initial reaction back at the house could have probably been a lot better.

He wonders what Jared’s mindset is right now. If he is frantic with worry over Jensen’s disappearance or has finally come to the decision that Jensen is too high maintenance, even without the blind thing. Oh, Jared will do his duty and try to find Jensen to the best of his abilities, of that Jensen has not doubt, but he isn’t sure if Jared`s heart will be in it, pun very much intended.

Not that Jensen could blame him. How many times is someone expected to reach out a helping hand only to have it slapped away? Once? Twice? Twenty times? Maybe, if he actually makes it out of here, Jensen has to be the one to hold out his hand, if he doesn’t want Jared to disappear.

Jensen chuckles, just his damn luck. He finally figures out what he wants and, more importantly, that he is willing to go after it, and it is most likely all for naught, because he is going to die in some dank underground hole.

He cocks his head in surprise as he can hear another set of steps nearing again. Didn’t really expect it to be so soon. Unlesssoon, unless his sense of time is off, it hasn’t even been an hour since Juan was here.

This time, the steps are heavier, two men at once, Jensen realizes. Means he most likely can't try and make a break for it this time either. Again, the trapdoor is opened and as another voice reaches Jensen’s ears, he is pretty sure that this time the Big Boss himself did him the honors.

“Special Agent Jensen Ackles. How the mighty have fallen.”

“Vargas,” Jensen takes pride in the calmness of his voice, wouldn’t want to give Vargas the satisfaction to see him scared.

An unpleasant laugh echoes through the room. “You remember me, then, I’m honored. But then I left you a pretty nice souvenir, didn’t I? Something for all the world to see.”

Jensen sighs. Vargas’ jokes were as bad as his lackey’s.

“But I see it wasn’t enough to drive that arrogance from you completely,” Vargas remarks darkly.

“Yeah, well, I’ve never been scared of rats,” Jensen shoots back. He imagines Vargas’s angry face right now – and takes great pleasure in it.

For his part, Vargas just gives a sneer. “And yet you're the done who is trapped in some underground hole right now like a rat. It is a good look for you, I have to admit.”

Suddenly Jensen hears a few quick snap-snap-snaps can be heard. He tenses, realizing the bastard just took pictures of him. And Jensen has no trouble imagining what they'll be used for.

“Like I said, a very good look for you.” Vargas chuckles. “I'm sure your partner will enjoy it as well.”

“If you think of luring him here with some lame-ass pictures, forget it. He'll never fall for it.” Jensen' voice carries a lot more confidence than he actually possesses.

In reality, he just isn't sure Jared won't rush off on some gung-ho rescue mission, ignoring everything Jensen ever taught him about relying on back-up and procedure. Because if the roles were reversed, Jensen can't say with certainty he wouldn't do that exact same thing.

Unfortunately Vargas seems to share Jensen's uncertainty, because Jensen can hear him make a wistful sound.

“Perhaps, perhaps not.”

Jensen forces his lips into a cold smile. “Even if he does, he'll bring the whole might of the FBI with him.”

“For your sake, I'll hope he shows more caring than that. Your death will get a lot easier.”

The words make Jensen's skin crawl as he has no trouble imagining the many way in which Vargas could live up to that threat. “Why do you want him anyway? I thought your beef was with me?”

“Oh, I'll deal with you, be sure of that,” Vargas promises darkly. “But your little boyfriend doesn't know when to let things rest. You might not have managed to drag me in front of your courts back then, but I have other enemies, way more powerful than your pitiful bunch. And they thought it a good opportunity to take me down. So I was forced to go into hiding.” He spits angrily.

“I'm sorry we inconvenienced you.” Now it's Jensen's turn to amp up the sarcasm.

Vargas ignores him, droning on. “It wasn't a complete bust. At least I could take comfort in the fact of you living the life of a miserable, lonely cripple.”

He chuckles again. “And I thought by leaving your country, I'd finally be left alone to take the time and rebuild, but as it turns out one Agent Padalecki can't leave well enough alone and keeps investigating me. So finally I decided to deal with it – once and for all.”

"Using me to get to him?" Jensen asks, horrified at the notion.

Vargas laughs. "I tried simpler means. But then, what is that charming saying you have? Catching two birds with one stone, yes?"

Quivering with rage, Jensen wishes he could beat that oily smugness out of Vargas right now.

"It won`t work."

"Like I said, we shall see. I do have my own little bird singing in my ear in your FBI," Vargas taunts.

Jensen's whole body freezes at the mention of the mole. He knew it. And yet hearing it confirmed by Vargas now saddens him. Not to mention taking his brain into overdrive on who it might be.

The thought must show on his face because Vargas cackles. “Would you like to know who your traitor is? I'll give you a little hint, Ackles, it's always the ones closest to us.”

Jensen's mind reels. Jared is out, of course. Vargas just said as much, and even in his darkest hours Jensen never even entertained the notion. Chris? No, he wouldn't.

But who else could it be? Someone close? In the last two years Jensen hasn't actually been close to anybody. Only…NO. It couldn't be, not Sandy, sweet, caring Sandy.

Again it is as if Vargas reads his mind. “Ah yes, pretty girl, isn't she. And how well she took care of you after basically selling you out.”

For a moment Jensen is taken back in time. He feels like he can feel the burning in his eyes, the smoke filling his nostrils. And now there is this terrible pain in his chest, in the place where his heart ought to be.

“Aww, don't think too badly of her,” Vargas speaks with mock sympathy. “She didn't really know. Besides, I can be quite convincing if I want to be. Especially when there is a sweet, little sister to dangle in front of Agents McCoy. One who'll do anything for the drugs I can provide her with.” He laughs suggestively.

Supressing the urge to heave, Jensen fights the wave of sickness he feels. He can vaguely recall meeting Sandy's little sister once, a sweet girl just like Sandy. He can only imagine what a guy like Vargas would do with her. Feelings of betrayal and sympathy war within him.

“But enough chit-chat now,” Vargas now adopts a business-like tone. “I'll see to it that Agent Padalecki will join us soon, and then the three of us will leave this world. Have a nice day till then.”

Jensen cocks his head at this information. Of course he is pretty clear on the concept that Vargas is talking figuratively when it comes to himself leaving the world – it will solve a lot of his problems after all - though his meaning is to be taken a lot more literal with Jared and Jensen. And in true movie bad guy manner Vargas just told the entrapped hero everything he planned. Of course, in movies, the hero usually escapes at the last second.

When the trap-door closes again with a bang, and Jensen is once more left alone, he can only pray for a movie-ending.

* * *

Jared is going crazy. It’s been ten hours already, and so far they have zip. Not a single lead to Jensen’s whereabouts. Despite everybody working non-stop, some of them doing thirty hour shifts already, and looking it.

Even Mike had shown up, driven right over from the hospital to help, but the combined forces of a worried Tom and the Special had been enough to make Mike see reason and get some necessary rest.

Jared himself is running on pure adrenaline at this point. Which is always a dangerous thing. But especially so when he finds the picture on his cell after returning from the bathroom.

His heart constricts at seeing the stubborn look on Jensen's face that still doesn't quite hide the fear underneath. From what Jared can tell Jensen is being kept in some stone-walled building but it's hard to tell since the picture doesn't show a lot. There is a message attached to it: Come alone or he dies.

Followed by an address.

Jared glances around wildly, almost expecting to see the sender, but there is only the usual hustle and bustle going on. Nobody is paying him any mind really, all wrapped up in figuring out Jensen's disappearance.

The thing to do now would be to inform the SAC or one of his fellow agents and mount a rescue op. Only Jared doesn't know if he'll be able to do that. The message is clear. And if Vargas so much as suspects FBI presence, Jared knows they won't get to Jensen before it's too late.

He doesn't entertain the hope Vargas would be stupid enough to send him the actual address on first contact. Nope, this will be a game of following breadcrumbs. Jared has seen kidnappers use it before. They'll give an address, usually a public area, where they'll leave hints to another location and so on and so forth, always watching who's showing up at the assigned places.

What further complicates thing is that Vargas apparently got his hands on some fine technical equipment. Agent Weatherly's death is a sad testament to the fact because the guy had been wired and under constant monitoring, and still Vargas had managed to snatch him up from right under their noses.

No, if Jared wants to find Jensen – alive – he'll have to play Vargas` game full throttle. At least at first. He figures dryly, that, if nothing else, it should give him time to think of a plan to not only escape this obvious trap himself but get Jensen out as well.

First things first, though, he needs to be sure he isn't followed or monitored by his own, no matter how convenient it might turn out later, the risk is too great. So he quickly deletes all messages from his cell and ditches the thing, making sure no one sees when he lets it slide into his desk drawer.

Then he informs Agent Manns', he's going down to the Labs to get a report on things, figuring that'll buy him some time. Manns' gives him an odd look since Jared could just as easily call them for whatever information he wants but he doesn't question it further. Which is exactly the reason Jared picked him. Guy is new enough not to have completely figured Jared out yet.

Once he thinks he is in the clear, Jared takes off and heads for the initial address, hoping there won't be too many of those pit-stops. By the third one he is getting antsy, and at number five Jared is ready to tear something – or someone – apart with his bare hands. He doesn't find another disposable cell in the usual trashcan though, so this might actually be the right place.

Jared finds himself checking it out from across the street. After all, he isn't a complete moron, knowing that if he rushes in half-cocked, it will only serve to get him captured as well - which will do neither himself nor Jensen any good. Thus, Jared bides his time, observing the building carefully. What surprises him is that it turned out to be an old church, of all things.

Not Vargas' style at all. The man used to choose abandoned factories as his favorite dwellings. Which has the FBI focusing their search on the downtown, industrial areas as a result. Smart fucker, Jared thinks grimly. A church wouldn't exactly scream “secret mobster hide-out” anyway. And, so far, as much as Jared can say, everything looks quiet, ordinary.

Slowly, he inches closer, making his way around the back to look for an entrance there. When he spots a small door, half hidden by overgrowth, Jared thinks he might finally be catching a break and silently slips inside.

A narrow hallway stretches out in front of him, mostly shrouded in darkness. Jared draws the weapon from his shoulder holster. He flattens to the wall when he hears someone nearing his position, coming somewhere from around the corner next to him. The little knife strapped to his forearm glides into the palm of his left hand with a comforting feeling.

Jared doesn't waste any time making his move – he knows the element of surprise is his greatest asses right now – and jumps the guy before he knows what hits him. Given his surroundings, he can only, pardon the pun, pray it doesn't turn out to be a priest or some innocent church-goers.

But Jared needn't have worried, for the guy, he is currently pinning to the floor, looks like neither. Not that the gun tucked into his pants isn't a dead give-away.

The guy opens his mouth to scream, but with a swift gesture Jared has his little knife pressed to his captive's throat.

“Where is Jensen,” Jared whispers dangerously.

The man stubbornly shakes his head, but Jared can see the recognition in his eyes. He knows where Jensen is, he is involved. Has maybe even hurt Jensen.

Jared's anger rises at the thought and he looks grimly down at the man, pressing the knife deeply against the vulnerable neck, till a thin line of blood appears. “I won't ask again,” he says menacingly. “Where.is.he?”

The guy swallows harshly, his pulse point jumping rapidly against the sharp blade. “Pl…please.”

Looking into the wide, frightened eyes gives Jared great satisfaction when he envisions what Jensen must be going through right now,

Suddenly, the guy's mouth twists into a grin. Jared lets go of the knife and swivels around, gun at the ready, but it's too late. A sharp pain hits his right side, and, as a result, Jared's own shot goes wide, missing his new attacker completely.

Holding onto his injured side, Jared sinks to his knees, losing his grip on his Glock. Damn, gunshot-wounds tend to hurt like a bitch, and he can already tell this is more than a simple graze. He grimaces in pain as goon number one comes up from behind him and shoves him to land facedown on the floor. Apparently, the lack of knife to his throat led to the guy to rediscovering his bravado.

“Not so tough now, huh?” Goon number one asks, delivering a not so gentle kick to Jared's midsection.

“Damnit, Sanchez, letting yourself get taken like an amateur,” Goon number two's voice can be heard.

“Shut up. And tell the boss we got another guest.”

Jared sees goon number two's expression hover on uncertainty for a second, before he shrugs.

“You think you'll be able to handle him now?”

Goon number one roughly grabs onto Jared's hair and pulls him up slightly. “Go!”

The other man shrugs again, before turning and rounding a corner.

Jared's captor gives him a shake. “You wanted to see your fuck-buddy? You'll get your wish.”

The words cause Jared's heartbeat to quicken. Jensen really is here somewhere. At least Jared has found him, will see him shortly. The thought is comforting, even if little else is right now.

Unfortunately, Sanchez, the goon, isn't a complete moron and he gives Jared a thorough pat-down for weapons before taking him to wherever Jensen is. Jared watches mournfully as the gun from his ankle holster is stripped away. Then Sanchez grabs onto him again and proceeds to half-drag, half-carry Jared with him.

Not long after, they seem to reach their destination because once more Jared finds himself shoved to the floor. His whole side is on fire right now, and he curls into himself protectively.

He watches as Sanchez opens the bolt on what appears to be a wooden trapdoor before he gives Jared a leer. “Time for a conjugal visit, eh?”

Jared is about to tell him to go to hell, when suddenly Sanchez disappears from his line of vision with a yelp. There is a surprised shout coming from further down, quickly followed by a heavy thud as you might get when banging someone's head into a wall.

Which is probably exactly what happened, Jared imagines. He tries to roll over and peer down the hole. “J…Jen?”

“Jay?” Comes the surprisingly not-very-surprised-sounding reply from somewhere beneath Jared. “You mind giving me a hand here? The wrist isn't doing so good now.”

Jared coughs. The very thought of moving not particularly appealing right now, but since Jensen just basically saved the two of them, Jared figures it's the least he can do.

“Just…just a sec,” he wheezes.

Then he moves to the edge of the hole, heart leaping at seeing Jensen seemingly uninjured, and extends a hand. Jensen 's right hand flails around in the air for a second, before he grabs onto Jared.

It takes some effort, but with combined forces they manage to lift Jensen out of the cell. Jensen finishes dragging his body up and crawls away from the hole, bumping right into Jared.

“Aaaah…careful there.” Jared bites back another shout as hands pat him down.

Jensen tenses. “What happened?”

“Nothing,” Jared forces out

“Nothing my ass, you're hurt,” Jensen says. His fingers gingerly run across Jared's side once more. "There is a lot of blood there."

"Yeah, bullets tend to do that," Jared forces out between clenched teeth. “What happened to Sanchez?” He slurs.

Jensen frowns. “Who?”

Jared gestures down the hole before remembering the futility of that. “Guy who just went down the rabbit hole,” he clarifies.

“Out like a light. And when he wakes up, he'll have a killer headache,” Jensen answers with a noticeable hint of pride in his voice.

“Not too shabby,” Jared answers, impressed.

Jensen looks surly. “They told me about their plans for you. I still had some semblance of hope you wouldn't fall for it, but then it sounded like someone was being dragged along and well, not hard to imagine whose heavy ass was being dragged."

Jared bites his lip, a bit hurt at the utter lack of acknowledgement for his - arguably - stupid but well-meaning rescue attempt.

"They told me... they'd kill you if I... didn't come, so excuse me... for caring about you." He coughs weakly. "And for...for the record, my ass is... not heavy."

Jensen sighs heavily, not in any mood for joking. “We need to get out of here quick. Please tell me back-up is on the way at least”

Jared gulps, refraining from answering.

“Oh, you gotta be kidding me. Don't tell me you came in here all alone.”

“Did you... not listen? They threatened... to kill you, and the...the note… said to…to come alone,” Jared forces out, the words sounding stupid to his own ears.

Jensen's fists hits the floor none too gently. “Have I taught you nothing? Going in without backup is the stupidest rookie-mistake there is.”

Jared wants to defend himself, but a second coughing fit cuts off his ability to speak.

“Easy,” Jensen says, the sudden gentleness in his voice belying the angry lines still marring his face. “I can't s…you have to tell me how bad it is,” Jensen says, frustration creeping into his voice.

“Just…just a flesh wound,“ Jared wheezes out.

Jensen snorts. “Yeah, sure, and I'm a perfect 20/20. I can feel the blood, Jay. Lots of it. ”

“I can walk,” Jared insists stubbornly.

Jensen hesitates at that, but he knows as well as Jared that they can't very well stay were they are. He climbs to his feet, dragging Jared with him. “Lean on me. And try to stay conscious. I need you…” He clears his throat, “…I need you to be my eyes.”

Despite the blinding pain, the words, Jensen's offer of trust in them, warms his heart. “Took you…long enough to…regain sense.”

* * *

“What do you mean, gone?” SAC Morgan asks dangerously.

Chris bites back a curse. Stupid Padalecki and his stupid hero complex. When Sandy told him Jared has apparently gone missing from the office, Chris couldn't believe it.

Sure, he can understand the kid's anxiety to retrieve Jensen, Chris shares in that, but running off alone isn't how things are done. They lead dangerous lives, and the only way to do so is by trusting your partner and your team.

“I…I don't know, Sir,” he answers the SAC. “He seems to have just disappeared. Apparently he told Manns he was heading down to the Lab but he never showed.”

"And Agent Manns didn't question this?" Morgan asks sharply.

“Well, it's not like Jared is a suspect,” Chris defends, “We aren't in the habit of regularly watching our own.”

From the corners of his eyes he notices Sandy being engaged on a tug-of-war with Jack. Since Jensen's disappearance, the dog has been absolutely frantic.

Morgan ignores them both to glower at Chris. “Don't give me attitude, son. Not right now.” He takes a deep breath. "Any leads?"

"We tracked the GPS in his cell but..."

"But what?"

"Apparently he left it behind, all calls deleted."

If possible, the SAC`s features darken even more. "So, we have nothing?"

Finally Chris ha something positive to report. “Wouldn't say that, Sir. I planted one of our new gimmicks in his jacket pocket. We managed to track it. Signal leads to an old church downtown.”

Morgan cocks his head. “We don't watch our own, eh?" He grins slightly, then sobers up again. "Old church, hm. You think Ackles might be there too?”

Jack can be heard barking, and by Sandy's cursing is apparently redoubling his efforts to break free.

Chris shrugs lightly. “Well, Padalecki kinda does work like a homing beacon with him.”

Morgan nods thoughtfully. “Then what the hell you waiting for? Bring him back – both of them - and kick his ass.”

Chris nods. “With pleasure.”

When Morgan turns on his heel Chris spares a glance towards Sandy who is still trying to calm Jack. She gives Chris a beseeching look, but he just shakes his head in sympathy. He doesn`t really have the time to help her right now. After all, there is a rescue op to put together.

* * *

“Move your heavy ass,” Jensen grits out the order, breathing heavily from the exhaustion of practically carrying Jared’s bulky form around. He keeps up the quickest pace he can manage without running head-on into things on the way. Still, he can`t help the occasionally stumble and bumps into the wall. Which, on top of everything else, is hell on his aching wrist.

Jared whines. “M’tired.”

“Sleep later, walk now.”


Damn, Jared’s speech is getting more slurred as time passes, and Jensen feels helpless. If only he could see for himself how bad the wound really is. He tried his best to dress it but from the way his own fingers are sticky with dried blood, it probably wasn’t such a rousing success.

Still, they need to keep on the move. And he needs Jared to stay awake and lead them. If Jared passes out from blood loss, they are both done for.

It strikes Jensen that Jared for all intents and purposes serves as his guide dog at the moment. The image gives him an idea and Jensen switches tactics. Whenever he wants to make Jack do something the dog doesn’t want to do, bribes usually work like a charm.

“If you keep moving now, I’ll let you have candy later,” Jensen offers. So okay, it’s a bit lame but Jared’s unhealthy obsession with candy is every bit as lame. Jensen just has to adapt to the situation.

“WanSschs,” Jared mumbles, leaning more heavily on Jensen.

Jensen mutters and tries to adjust to the added weight. He now keeps very close to the wall, fingers of his left hand running along the rough surface to help him keep a sense of his bearings.

"What was that?"

“I wan... sex,” Jared repeats, this time more clearly.


Jared nods dopily. “Lots... of sex.”

“Yeah, yeah, alright. You can have sex. Just tell me where we’re going, okay?”

“Straight ah...ahead. I th...thin there is...is an exit,” Jared says.

And Jensen moves on with renewed vigor, an exit means getting outside. And outside means possibly finding help. He doesn’t know how long he can carry on with Jared getting heavier by the minute. Or so it seems to Jensen at least.

The call startles Jensen, causing him to lose his footing, falling to his knees and taking Jared with him.

“Ow,” comes the pained exclamation from somewhere to his left.

“Sorry, kind of busy trying to save our lives here,” Jensen grits out. He doesn't know what to do right now. They're sitting ducks like this, especially as he can't even see their attacker. He shakes Jared once more. “Jay, godamnit, pay attention. What's happening, who's there?”

Jared giggles. “Hey it's Chris, hi Chris.”

Jensen feels movement at his side, apparently Jared is waving like mad. But he is too relieved right now to worry over Jared's deteriorating mental state. “Chris?” He calls out.

“Jen?” Hasty steps coming in their direction can be heard. “Damn, man, it's good to see you. We thought…well, good to see.”

Chris has reached them and puts a hand on Jensen's shoulder, before there is a muttered what the hell, and Jensen finds himself drawn into a tight embrace. He revels in it for a second before distracting himself from friend.

“Chris, look after Jared. He has been shot. I don't know how bad it is.”

Jensen hears Chris give a low whistle but can't tell if it is of the good or the bad kind.

“Blood-loss is heavy but it looks like the bullet went straight through at least,” Chris explains. "I don't think it hit any major organs."

Finally a bit of good news. About damn time as far as Jensen is concerned. He feels Chris' hand on his elbow.

"Give me a sec, I'll radio out."

Jensen can hear the tell-tale click before Chris reports their location and Jared`s condition to someone - most likely the SAC.

“Come on, we have to get out of here. Place's still not fully secured."

Jensen groans. “Great, just great.”

“Hey, be thankful we were able to track Lassie here. Otherwise you'd still be down the well, Timmy." Chris gives Jensen a friendly push. "Come on, we got the building surrounded. Just have to take you outside."

Tiredly Jensen pushes himself up to his feet again. Though at least this time Chris is there to carry the bulk of Jared's weight.

“Mmmno, wan Jen. Ish cuddly,” Jared mumbles.

“Well, sorry to not meet your high standards, lover boy,” Chris says cheerily. “But your cuddly Jen looks ready to drop dead on his feet if he has to carry your ass any longer.”

Jared's warm breath ghosts over Jensen's face. “You…o..kay?” He asks with great difficulty.

“Yeah, yeah, fine. You worry about yourself for now, Jay.”

Just then Jensen hears the excited barking of a dog. Jack.

“Damn fleabag,” Chris mumbles.

It doesn't take long till Jensen feels Jack's weight propel into him, almost knocking him on his ass and a wet tongue starts to lick his face all over.

“Urgh, down boy. Alright, good boy, now stop.” Jensen tries to dissuade the dog but to avail. Sighing, he allows Jack to finish his show of affection, petting his head in return.

“Why is he here?” He asks Chris.

“Damn if I know, I left him at base with Tom."

Jensen shakes his head. Tom will have to answer for that, letting his poor dog loose in a possible danger zone.

Also, if he is not totally mistaken, he might get that chance sooner than he thinks for he hears Tom`s voice among the sudden hustle nearing them.

“How`s Jared? Ambulance is waiting. What about you, Jen? You okay?”

Jensen nods. “I'm fine, just a few bumps and bruises. But Jared is in bad shape."

He feels a sudden loss when Jared's weight is taken from him by the oncoming agents. Touching his leg to signal Jack to come with him, Jensen grabs onto Chris` elbow tightly, allowing him to take the lead now.

It only takes a minute till they've finally reached the ambulance. Chris helps Jensen climb into it and guides him to sit next to Jared. An EMT protests the presence of Jack in the car but Chris simply tells him to shut it and concentrate on his patient.


Jared's voice is small, beseeching and Jensen feels around for Jared's hand, intertwining their fingers.

“Don' for…get,” Jared insists.

“Don't forget what, Jay?”

“Pr..promise,” Jared says. “Sex.”

Beside him Jensen hears Chris snort. “Is that all you guys can think about?”

Jensen feels himself blush. “Had to find a way to keep him going, didn't I?” he grumbles.

Chris laughs. “And you accomplished that by promising to rent out your ass afterwards. You know if this is all over I might have to arrest you for illegal solicitating.”

Jensen flips him the bird. Or maybe he flips one of the medics the bird but it's the thought that counts.

“Great…ass,” Jared pipes up.

Jensen groans, almost wishing himself back into his cell where dopey boyfriends didn't completely humiliate him to friends and strangers alike. At least the EMTs continue to work in relative silence, judging by the small sounds Jensen can make out.“

"Can't argue there,” Chris responds.

The unexpected response leads Jensen swivel in his seat and almost falling down, especially as the car takes a sharp turn just then. “Ass,” he exclaims.

“Hey, just because I'm happy with Steve doesn't mean I'm dead,” Chris says laughingly. “You were always just too damn pretty for your own good.”

“If I'm such hot stuff, how come you never made a pass at me?” Jensen asks.

Apparently Jared isn't as far gone as Jensen believed because he feels himself gripped by surprisingly strong hands. “No passes. You…mine.”

“The caveman has spoken,” Chris announces. “Seems like your ass is spoken for.”

“Hm-hm,” Jared confirms happily.

Then he starts patting Jensen's right thigh, triggering responses in Jensen's body they really don't have time for right now.

“Whoa, down boy,” Chris says. “We got company.”

It doesn't take long for them to reach the hospital, and once more Chris lends Jensen a helping hand, this time to disembark from the car. Funny, how Jensen doesn't mind so much anymore. Escaping a crazed mobster, hell-bent on killing you seems to work wonders for the Ego.

Chris whistles when they step into the hospital. "Wow, looks like everybody is here already."

Before Jensen can inquire as to who ´everbody´ really is, a big booming voice answers his question at least partly.

"Ackles, are you alright? You gave us all quite a scare. How did you get out?"

Morgan. Jensen is surprised to find the SAC here already. Mission must have been a success then. He nods. “M'fine. And, long story."

Jensen makes a startled noise as he feels himself being drawn into another tight embrace. First Chris, now Morgan. What is the world coming to?

“Good to have you back, Jensen,” Morgan whispers in his ear.

Swallowing heavily, Jensen doesn't know what to say to that. But Morgan is already letting go of him, probably even more surprised about his sudden emotional outburst than Jensen was.

Jensen tries to diffuse the situation. "How did things go back there? Did you get him?"

Morgan doesn't have to ask whom Jensen is referring to. "We caught him, kinda. He is dead now."

“He tried to escape?”

“Suicide,” Morgan says.

Usually that would be a more than disappointing end to a case. At least it had always felt that way to Jensen. You aimed for an arrest, not a kill. But right here, right now, he feels bone-tired and simple relief that the nightmare is finally over. Sure, there would be a successor, a new head to the snake but for them it wouldn't be personal with either the FBI or Jensen and Jared. And for now that meant a lot.

"Well, he did plan on dying today," Jensen mutters.

"What?" Morgan sounds confused.

"Nothing," Jensen says tiredly. "Can I...has Jared been taken to surgery? I`d like to...to wait outside."

"Of course, probably should get a look at that arm too. Agent McCoy,” Morgan calls out and Jensen freezes.

Sandy. He has almost forgotten about her.

“Sir,” he grabs a hold of Morgan's jacket. “Is Agent McCoy here?”

“Jensen?” Morgan sounds serious.

“Is she here?” Jensen asks.

A small hand falls onto his shoulder. “Yeah, Jen, I'm here. What's the matter?” Sandy's voice sounds the same as always and Jensen still can't fully believe what he now knows to be true.

"How is your sister?" Jensen knows it's a low blow, but he feels like he is entitled at least one of those where Sandy is concerned.

She doesn't even try to pretend, choking back a sob. “He told you, didn't he?”

“Agent McCoy? What is going on?” Morgan's voice sounds cold.

“My little sister, he promised he'd let her go if I helped him. I couldn't…she is so young, he put her on drugs, used her up,” Sandy babbles, clearly in tears. “I'm…I'm sorry Jen, so sorry.“

Jensen feels Special going rigid. “You mean to tell me that it was you who gave classified information to Vargas?”

“Yes…yes, Sir. I'm sor—“

“Save it for the investigation, McCoy.”

Another sob. “Jen, please believe me, I didn't know what he would…didn't know about the bomb. I tried to tell him, make it clear you weren't a threat to him anymore, that you were--” .

“Helpless?” Jensen asks sadly. He`d always believed that if he finally did get his hands on the mole, he'd gleefully tear them to shreds. But now there is just an overwhelming sadness, even pity.

“I really am sorry,” she says in a small, pleading voice.

Jensen doesn't respond. He believes her but it doesn't really change anything.

“Agents, Dushku and Bush, take Agent McCoy into custody,” Morgan's voice rings out. He sounds less understanding of it all.

“Wait,” Jensen calls to no one in particular. “Just tell me one of thing, Sandy. Is that why you helped me? Why you took care of me? Guilt?” It makes his heart heavy to think that Sandy had just kept being his friend out of obligation.

“No, I…You don't have much reason to believe in anything I say right now but it wasn't just guilt, Jen.”

He wants to believe her, so much but he doesn't know if he can. Doesn't know if he'll ever be able to forgive her. “Good-bye, Sandy.” He turns away from he believes her to be. “Can I... go see Jared now.”

Morgan puts a comforting hand on his shoulder. “Sure.”

* * *


“This is a bad time?” Jensen asks when he enters Jared's hospital room.

“Never a bad time for you,” Jared says, smiling. “Where is Jack?”

“Left him at the nurses station outside,” Jensen explains.

Jensen picks at the hem of his jacket. “Doctors tell me you're making a good recovery,” he starts cheerily.

“Hm, hm. I heard you're gonna rejoin our happy band?”

He can clearly read the surprise on Jen's face. Probably didn't figure Jared would have heard about this already. “Well, that's getting ahead of things a little bit. SAC pulled some strings. Offered me a position as a consultant, you know. Profiling and stuff.”

“They're lucky to have you,” Jared says. “You should take it.”

Jensen scratches his head. “I don't know. Morgan probably only felt bad for me.”

Jared sighs. “On this case you were the one taken into protective custody yet you managed to end up saving the life of two agents. So don't sell yourself short.” He smirks. “Besides, I don't think the SAC believes it would get him into your pants so why would he bother?”

“This is not…he is not…” Jensen looks adorably flustered.

So Jared decides to take pity on him. “Relax. I know it's over between the two of you.” He draws a deep breath. “Which kinda begs another question of it being over.”

Jensen sports a look of pure panic. “So, speaking of Morgan, he given you hell for your disappearing act?” .

“Don't,” Jared says sharply. He can't deal with those evasive tactics of Jensen's, not anymore. He needs to know where he's at.

Jensen looks taken aback. “I was just—“

“Making small-talk,” Jared cuts him off. “Avoiding the subject.”

“Yeah, well, this isn't easy for me.”

Jared gives a short, slightly bitter, laugh. “And you think it is for me?” He sighs, trying to remain calm. “What are we?”

“Huh?” Honest confusion speaks from Jensen's pretty features.

“I mean, what are we,” Jared clarifies, “Are we lovers? Exes? Old friends? Acquaintances? What, Jen?”

“I,” Jensen hesitates, and Jared's heart sinks. Jared isn't sure he has the strength to keep waiting for Jensen to make up his mind any longer. “I think we're definitely more than friends,” Jensen starts slowly.

“And?” Jared prompts.

Jensen fidgets. “And I think we're more than exes too.”

Jared cocks his head. “So technically that makes us…a couple again?”

“I…I think so.” Jen smiles tentatively.

It's a lot and Jared should be happy with it but he needs it all right now. “You gotta say it, Jen. I gotta hear it,” he presses on gently.

Jensen lowers his gaze to the floor, and for a second Jared wonders if he was too greedy. If he spooked Jen too much and any moment now he is going to bolt from the room, never to come back.

“I love you.”

Jensen says so silently Jared needs to strain his ears to hear it. But he hears it nevertheless. Ignoring the ever-present dull ache in his chest, he pushes himself up from his position on the bed.

“Hey, what…what are you doing?” He hears Jensen's concerned voice.

“Showing you the feeling is mutual,” Jared says, right before his hands close around Jensen's upper arms, drawing the other man closer so Jared can press his mouth to Jensen's.

“Mmmph,” Jensen groans out.

He extracts himself from Jared a bit. “And you sure you are okay with…” Jensen gestures to his eyes.

Jared gently cups Jensen's cheek. “Are you?”

Jensen bites his lip. “For the longest time I wasn't…but now maybe I think I can be,” he offers.

“You will,” Jared promises.

“Might be a bumpy ride,” Jensen warns him.

Jared grins, even though Jen can't see. “Wouldn't want it any other way.”

“Jay,” Jensen gently admonishes him. “This is serious.”

Jared sobers. “I know. And I'll help you every step of the way. As long as you let me.”

“I'll try.”

Jared presses another soft kiss on Jen's lips, before his mouth inches upwards, grazing Jensen's eyes.


“Don't shut me out, Jensen. Let me show you that you're more than anything for me, just the way you are.”

Jensen snorts. “You're an enormous sap, you know that?”

“And you're a grouchy jerk. So I guess we compliment each other,” Jared points out.

“Guess so.”

Jared smiles. “I seem to recall something about you offering me all the sex I want?”

Jensen's mouth opens to a silent “oh”.

“You remember that?”

“Of course, I do.”

“Was trying to save your life at the time.”

“So, a promise is a promise,” Jared says mercilessly.

“Alright, Padalecki, I'll make you a deal. You get out of this hospital bed and then we can test your stamina.”

Jared laughs. “You're on.”

Maybe it's his incredibly sappy nature but he has a feeling things are going to work out between the two of them.

- The End -


( 174 have dazzled me — Dazzle me )
Page 1 of 6
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Jul. 11th, 2008 07:33 pm (UTC)
Such a lovely, story, hon, and I feel a little bad about jumping in here and commenting when I know you're probably hovering over your inbox waiting to hear what everyone else thinks, but I just wanted to re-iterate how much I enjoyed this. I really have a blind!endangered!Jensen kink, and pining!protective!Jared just frosts the cake. Wonderful.
Jul. 11th, 2008 08:16 pm (UTC)
Such a lovely, story, hon, and I feel a little bad about jumping in here and commenting when I know you're probably hovering over your inbox waiting to hear what everyone else thinks,

No, not at all. I`m just happy you keep liking the fic. :)

I really have a blind!endangered!Jensen kink

Heh. Me too. I have mad love for all kinds of disability-fic, but especially blindness.
Jul. 11th, 2008 08:38 pm (UTC)
i really enjoyed reading your story, i liked jensen very much and how cute jared was...and i never really saw sandy coming, i thought maybe chris or eliza dushku but sandy was a surprise - well done :)

Thanks for sharing :)
Jul. 12th, 2008 11:16 am (UTC)
i really enjoyed reading your story, i liked jensen very much and how cute jared was...and i never really saw sandy coming, i thought maybe chris or eliza dushku but sandy was a surprise - well done :)

I tried to give a few false leads with the mole and Sandy struck me as someone you really wouldn`t suspect easily. Of course when the real life Jared/Sandy announcement came, I fretted this could be seen as bashing when it truly was just dramatic licence.

Thank you so much. I`m happy you liked it.
Jul. 11th, 2008 09:40 pm (UTC)
Lovely! I have a huge soft spot for disability fics and I really liked this. I loved Jared and Jensen and their complicated relationship and I adored the secondary characters, especially Jeff and Jack. Loved Jensen hugging Jack after the explosion.
Jul. 12th, 2008 11:17 am (UTC)
I have a huge soft spot for disability fics

Me too. So I`m happy this one worked for you.

and I adored the secondary characters, especially Jeff and Jack. Loved Jensen hugging Jack after the explosion.

Awww, thank you. I really tried making Jack a character in his own right. Hopefully that worked.

Thank you muchly.
Jul. 11th, 2008 09:49 pm (UTC)
awww, I loved it! I love bitter Jensen, and how he pretty much has to deal, I mean seriously blind would be hard to get used to. Jared was good as well, not minupiltive or anything or too much the perfect boyfreind.

Jul. 12th, 2008 11:19 am (UTC)
and how he pretty much has to deal, I mean seriously blind would be hard to get used to.

Very much so, I imagine. I`m not sure I could handle it.

Thank you so much. It`s great you enjoyed the fic. *dances*
Jul. 11th, 2008 09:58 pm (UTC)
Weee! That was fun! ^_^ I loved how completely opposite Jensen and Jared were. How Jared, despite how many times Jensen kept pushing him away, he wouldn't give up. I even wanted to slap Jensen around a bit. O.o Love the added suspense as well. Always my favorite in stories.

Good job! Very well written. Thanks for sharing!
Jul. 12th, 2008 11:22 am (UTC)
I loved how completely opposite Jensen and Jared were. How Jared, despite how many times Jensen kept pushing him away, he wouldn't give up. I even wanted to slap Jensen around a bit.

Aww. I figured Jensen would be one of those people who`d have a really hard time adjusting to something like this (like I probably would :), while Jared is more the well-meaning, cheerful kind who doesn`t really know how to step back a bit. Thus the blow-out at first. But then opposites attract and compliment each other, too. *g*

Thank you so much.
Jul. 11th, 2008 10:38 pm (UTC)
Very nice story. Enjoyable characters.
Jul. 12th, 2008 11:22 am (UTC)
Thank you muchly. Glad you liked it.
Jul. 11th, 2008 11:24 pm (UTC)
Hah. I knew when I browsed through the story announcement in that "what will be written"-entry thingie, that this sounded awesome. And it is, indeed. Love the dynamic between Jensen and Jared. And how you keep all the characters balanced.
Jul. 12th, 2008 11:23 am (UTC)
Hah. I knew when I browsed through the story announcement in that "what will be written"-entry thingie, that this sounded awesome. And it is, indeed.

Thank you so much, I`m so glad it lived up to your expectations. *blushes and bows*
(no subject) - junalele - Jul. 12th, 2008 05:26 pm (UTC) - Expand
(Deleted comment)
Jul. 12th, 2008 11:26 am (UTC)
Yay, I`m happy to see you found the story - and Jensen`s little arc - believable and satisfying and mellowed to him a bit. :)
Thank you so much.
Jul. 12th, 2008 12:30 am (UTC)
I thought this was really sweet and I love the happy ending. But at the start, I thought Jared was totally over the line. Kicking down Jensen's door?!? Manhandling someone smaller and less healthy and blind?!? It seems like other people weren't too sympathetic to Jensen, but I wanted to kick Jared's ass! Like you said somewhere in the story, all Jensen has left is his pride, so why's Jared going out of his way to prove to Jensen that he's totally powerless?

But I liked Jared more by the end. Being injured seemed to make him a little more tolerable.

Thanks for sharing this!

Jul. 12th, 2008 06:10 am (UTC)
I had thought kicking the door down was intense, then I realised... he may have thought the bad guys had come for jensen already when jensen didnt reply, thus kicking the door in.

As for the other stuff... Love makes people do crazy things I guess, and Jensen was blocking him at every point possible, so he snapped a lil in making a point... not smart, but yeah..

And I also loved this!
(no subject) - astri13 - Jul. 12th, 2008 12:04 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - astri13 - Jul. 12th, 2008 11:41 am (UTC) - Expand
Jul. 12th, 2008 01:06 am (UTC)
Really enjoyed this!Thank you so much...
Jul. 12th, 2008 12:05 pm (UTC)
No, thank you. I`m glad you liked it.
Jul. 12th, 2008 01:22 am (UTC)
omg loved this;D Really good job!
Jul. 12th, 2008 12:05 pm (UTC)
Thank you muchly. I`m glad you enjoyed. :)
Jul. 12th, 2008 01:38 am (UTC)
oh. I simply loved this. and I'm still crying for Sandy's sister*weeps* I hate Vargas!!*steps on him*
but I'm so truly happy everything's gonna be ok between our golden boys..I would have liked some more Mike/Tom though, but I'm not that greedy. great job!!
Jul. 12th, 2008 12:08 pm (UTC)
oh. I simply loved this. and I'm still crying for Sandy's sister*weeps* I hate Vargas!!*steps on him*

Awww. *helps in stepping on him*

I would have liked some more Mike/Tom though, but I'm not that greedy.

Initially I had planned on making this much longer with extended scenes with the secondary characters but stupid real life intruded. *kicks RL*

Thank you muchly, I`m glad you enjoyed the fic.
(no subject) - trinipedia - Jul. 12th, 2008 12:20 pm (UTC) - Expand
Jul. 12th, 2008 03:49 am (UTC)
Yayyyy!!!You make a J2 story again!!I always love your fic,from Horseman!verse,cheese!verse,twins!Jared verse,Indiana jones!adaptation verse,and now this!never thought you participated in bigbang!!*squishes*
I'm in internet caffe now,and hafta go,as soon as i already read this,i'll give you a coherent comment!!*squeee*

p.s:will you participated in J2au summer time challenge too??^^
Jul. 12th, 2008 12:10 pm (UTC)
Awww. *blushes* Thank you so very, very much. I`m happy I didn`t disappoint.

p.s:will you participated in J2au summer time challenge too??^^

I totally missed this challenge. Is it already up and running?
Jul. 12th, 2008 04:38 am (UTC)
I love this. I like disability fics and this one is beautifully written. I also liked the mystery of figuring out who the mole was.
Jul. 12th, 2008 12:12 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much. I`m a fan of disability stories as well, so I wanted to try my hands at one. And great, the mole-hunt was a mystery, I tried my best to keep up the suspense there. :)
Jul. 12th, 2008 04:58 am (UTC)
I love this fic! I like that there were no miracle cures, and a lot of this was just growing into the events that occurred- you could have made Jensen fine with being blind after an adventure of a few days, and what a copout that would have been! Because of course it will take a long time, and even then it will not be constant and there will be difficult days ahead!

Thanks for posting, I really enjoyed this story!
Jul. 12th, 2008 12:14 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much. Yup, yup, from the start I knew there would be no miracle recovery for the physical part, and the title is just a reference to Jensen regaining his sense of worth. So I`m very glad it work for you and you found it a satisfying read.
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