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Babyfic: Merry Cheese-mas

You guys, I wish you all a

Merry Christmas or Frohe Weihnachten, Happy Chanukkah, Bon Noèl... In short have yourself some Nice Holidays. *waves*

Also, because I feel bad-eroni for not getting the next chapter of Horseman up before Christmas (though believe me in this case faster wouldn`t have been better in any way *g*), I bring a little offering in the spirit of Christmas. A schmoopy little vignette in the Cheeseverse

Title: Merry Cheese-mas
Pairing/Rating: Jared/Jensen, NC-17
Genre: RPS AU, Crack
Summary: Jared learns the wonders of Christmas
Word count: 742
Disclaimer: I own jack, least of all Jared and Jensen. This is also very, very much fiction.

Nearly one whole year had passed since a benevolent fairy had granted Jared's wish, and he was adapting to human life quite well. His job as a taste tester was going great, and life - as well as sex - with his Jensen was glorious and only getting better as the days went on. Sure, sometimes Jensen could be "high maintenance" as humans used to call it, like the time he had spotted their videos on the Internet. Jensen had been so unreasonable, claiming Jared couldn't just tape them during lovemaking and then share the experience with other people online.

And no matter how many times Jared had pointed out how incredibly popular they were, how many enthusiastic fan mail they received, Jensen hadn`t relented. In the end a deeply put-upon Jared had been forced to take down "Bendy Jensen", the Website Jared had so lovingly created in hours upon hours of work. Jensen hadn't even seemed very sorry about it. Thankfully Jared was a very generous and forgiving individual. At least with Jensen he was gladly so accommodating but with others it seemed a bit unfair that Jared should always be the one to make sacrifices because that stupid saying proclaimed that "the bigger person would do so" and Jared usually was the biggest person around.

Now though every grievance was forgotten because a special time of the year had arrived, and Jared was vibrating with excitement. He had come to love human holidays because usually they involved the consumption of lots and lots of food. So far there had been Egg-Day, Pie-Day and his current favourite Turkey-Day. Jensen used other names for them but Jared didn't understand this need to not call things like they truly were.

Jared couldn't imagine anything beating Turkey Day but Jensen assured him this "Christmas" thing would be even better as not only there would be the usual food but also the exchange of nice presents. And since nothing could be better than food Jared assumed said presents would also consist of edible goods. Double score.

"Christmas" also came with a couple of neat traditions. For one there was this mistle toe and while the general idea appealed to Jared very much, it clearly needed some improvement still. So when Jensen came home that evening he found the apartment covered in little pieces of cheese, which Jared had seemingly hung up everywhere. Not that he had the chance to verify this assessment because Jared grabbed him and proceeded to happily kiss him under each and every piece, slowly walking them to the bedroom where Jensen promptly forgot about everything but the way Jared's thrusts nearly drove him straight through the headboard.

Then there was Santa, as Jared understood it a fat man in a thick red coat who would come at night and bring their food-presents. Jensen tried to explain how this Santa-person didn't exist and was a made-up figure for small children but Jared didn't want to take any risks on his first official Christmas as a human. After all benevolent fairies were said to be imaginary too and yet if not for one of them Jared would still pine away after Jensen in his little hole in the wall.

So he put out the plate with cookies, right next to their little Christmas tree with the cheese ball decorations. He looked forward to finding lots and lots of presents under the tree by morning. Jared was good at math and if one added up the presents Jared himself had for Jensen, the ones Jensen surely had for him in return and Santa's presents for both of them, well, that should equal lots.

He tried to stay awake to sneak some glance at Santa but Jensen called to him from the bedroom and well, one had to have priorities. Jensen was already on the bed, naked except for the big red bow wrapped around him and the Santa hat on top of his head. He wore a wide, happy grin and beckoned Jared to him.

"You may open your first present right now."

Jared grinned back. Not all presents needed to be food to look good enough to eat after all. He wondered if in the sense of Christmas spirit Jensen would be willing to share with the downtrodden this time. If Jared put some work into it, "Bendy Jensen" could be up and running again by noon tomorrow. Still, first they clearly needed new material…

* * *


( 47 have dazzled me — Dazzle me )
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Dec. 22nd, 2007 06:50 pm (UTC)
i love it
and this was awesome!
Dec. 22nd, 2007 09:25 pm (UTC)
*blushes* Thank you muchly. Glad you liked it. :)
Dec. 22nd, 2007 07:33 pm (UTC)
I ADORE the cheeseverse, love it love it! thank you. have very happy holidays. :D
Dec. 22nd, 2007 09:24 pm (UTC)
Aww, thank you. I`m glad Mouse!Jared is still enjoyable. :)
Dec. 22nd, 2007 09:22 pm (UTC)
Hmm...I think I like the idea of Bendy!Jensen. ;-)
Dec. 22nd, 2007 09:24 pm (UTC)
I think the site would get lots of hits for sure. *g* Thank you so much.
(no subject) - geeky_ginger - Dec. 22nd, 2007 09:28 pm (UTC) - Expand
Dec. 23rd, 2007 05:03 pm (UTC)
Cheeseverse... Yay!

Merry Christmas to you too!
Dec. 23rd, 2007 08:16 pm (UTC)
Heh. Christmas just needs a bit of cheese. *g* Thank you muchly.
(Deleted comment)
Dec. 23rd, 2007 08:17 pm (UTC)
No, thank you. I`m blushing right now and insanely happy you like this verse so much. Thank you muchly.
Dec. 23rd, 2007 07:39 pm (UTC)
This is one of the most adorable verses ever!
Dec. 23rd, 2007 08:16 pm (UTC)
Aww, thrilled you think so. Thank you muchly.
Dec. 23rd, 2007 08:14 pm (UTC)
Oi, does this mean no Horseman #5 this weekend? :/

Dec. 23rd, 2007 08:21 pm (UTC)
Awww, sorry. :/ I got it back from beta though so with a few tweakings here and there to make it post-ready, I`m shooting for Wednesday to give everyone enough time to enjoy their Christmas prezzies. :)
Dec. 23rd, 2007 08:32 pm (UTC)
bendy jensen haha. This verse is the top quality crack. I love how naive jared is and just wants to hare the love ahem. I remember he identified his two qualities as food and sex. hehe all the fanmail oh wow...
Dec. 23rd, 2007 08:44 pm (UTC)
I remember he identified his two qualities as food and sex. hehe all the fanmail oh wow...

Heh. He is such an Id-Boy. But then as a former mouse he probably can`t help it. *g*
Thank you so much. Glad you`re liking it.
Dec. 23rd, 2007 11:48 pm (UTC)
oh the cheese verse is love love love
Dec. 24th, 2007 12:39 am (UTC)
Glad you liked it. :) Thanks muchly.
Dec. 24th, 2007 01:56 am (UTC)
"Bendy Jensen". And fanmail. And Egg-Day, Pie-Day and Turkey-Day. And Jensen wrapped in a big red bow. There are too many funny things in such a short fic! XD

Et Joyeux Noël!
Dec. 26th, 2007 10:50 pm (UTC)
There are too many funny things in such a short fic! XD

*takes a bow* :) Thank you so much.

Dec. 24th, 2007 02:38 am (UTC)

*cackles like a witch*

BENDY JENSEN *giggles*

What website is this??


*dies laughing*

Loved it ;D

Thanks for sharing ;D
Dec. 26th, 2007 10:52 pm (UTC)

Awww. I`m afraid it got purged by the anti-porn activists. Heathens.

Thank you so much. Glad you liked.
Dec. 24th, 2007 07:23 am (UTC)
This verse is made of crazy, the good kind. Goodness Jared the web geek desining "Bendy Jensen" (he made me think how bendy is he in this, he a former gymnast?). It sounds great, i love how jay just does not get it. Afterall they get fanmail!
Oh and his belief in Santa and the like is too cute, cheesy mouse jared aaaawh and Jensen in a bow being better than food he.
Dec. 24th, 2007 07:24 am (UTC)
oh oops poseted twice well i love it!
(no subject) - astri13 - Dec. 26th, 2007 10:56 pm (UTC) - Expand
Dec. 24th, 2007 12:45 pm (UTC)
Hilarious, just hilarious. :)
Dec. 26th, 2007 10:57 pm (UTC)
Yay, glad you think so. Thanks so much.
Dec. 29th, 2007 03:30 am (UTC)
*smiles like a loon

I love cheese!verse. Mouse turned human Jared is one of my favorites.

I love Egg-day, Pie-day and Turkey-day!

Rock on!!
Dec. 29th, 2007 02:42 pm (UTC)
I love Egg-day, Pie-day and Turkey-day!

Who doesn`t? :) Thank you muchly. Glad you enjoyed it.
Jan. 6th, 2008 10:46 pm (UTC)
OMG! I think I read the first two Jared!mouse stories some time ago, but Jeez, it's so so cute! I already loved it when I read it the first time, but this little Christmas story is so cool^^
Jan. 6th, 2008 10:50 pm (UTC)
Thank you. Mouse!Jared started out as some silly one-shot, never meant to make more of it but writing him is kinda fun. :)
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( 47 have dazzled me — Dazzle me )



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