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Ficlet: Natural causes

Title: Natural causes
Author: astri13
Characters/Pairings: Sam, Dean
Genre: Gen, humor
Word Count: 506
Summary: There are some truths Dean is just not ready to face.
Disclaimer: No copyright infringement intended; fair use only. Not created for profit.
Notes: Fluff piece written for spnflashfic



"I'm telling you, Sam, this is a curse," Dean forces out between clenched teeth. He squirms uncomfortably on the bed.

Sam rolls his eyes, exasperated. Since the physical …transformation, they've had this conversation like a million times. And Sam is pretty sure they aren't dealing with a curse, spell, angry spirit or one of the other supernatural causes his brother propositioned. Well, about ninety-five percent sure. If Dean weren't being his usual pigheaded self, he would see it too.

Still, Sam fights to remain patient. "It's not a curse, Dean. You'll see, it will be better soon."

Dean scoffs. "And I'm telling you, that chick from the bar has it in for me. She did this." He gestures to himself as best as he can, considering the state his hands are in. He squirms some more.

Sam gapes. "Dude, will you give it a rest? She didn't even talk to you," he points out reasonably.

"She looked at me funny," Dean pouts.

Now Sam fights to hold onto his rapidly slipping sanity. "Maybe she thought you were hot?" he offers. This at least is something Dean shouldn't feel the need to argue with.

And indeed, Dean seems thoughtful for a moment. "Well…um…of course she did." His eyes open wide. "You think that's why she did it? Because I didn't hit on her?"

"For the love of God, Dean, nobody did anything to you. Sure, it's a bit unusual in your case but these things just happen." Sam wants to bang his head against the wall. No strike that, he wants to bang Dean's head against the wall.

"They do not."

"Do too."

"Not."

"Too." Sam stops, realizing how ridiculous they must sound. Two grown men, seasoned hunters, reduced to arguing like four-year-olds. He clears his throat and tries anew to talk some sense into Dean. "'Look, if it makes you feel better, we can go to a hospital, get you checked out."

Dean glowers. "Over my dead body. You think I want anybody to see me like this?"

Sam figures this is probably not a good time to tell Dean that earlier, when Dean was sleeping, Sam has snapped a few pictures with his camera phone. He tries to hide his grin. Maybe there will never be a good time for this, though Dean will probably find out because Sam has mailed the photos to Bobby, Ellen and Joshua, and one of them is bound to crack up the next time Dean talks to them.

"Then there isn't much else we can do." Sam shrugs.

"You could research. Why don't you fire up the laptop already?"

"Because there is nothing to research, dude. I already know what to do. And so do you, you taught me after all." Sam inclines his head to Dean's hands, clad in thick woollen gloves which Sam has taped shut all around Dean's wrists to keep him from scratching.

Dean's face turns red, so much so that the angry dots on his skin seem to fade. When he speaks, he enunciates each word carefully. "For the last time, Sam, I.do.not.have.CHICKEN.POX."

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Comments

( 18 have dazzled me — Dazzle me )
tsuki_no_bara
Oct. 2nd, 2007 06:08 pm (UTC)
heee! poor itchy dean.... i love "she didn't even talk to you." "she looked at me funny." and that sam appeals to dean's vanity to get him to see reason. very cute. ^_^
astri13
Oct. 2nd, 2007 06:15 pm (UTC)
Heh. Thank you. I`m drawing my inspiration from a real-life cases of the "kids get that, I`m not a kid, therefore I do not have it" logic. Seemed fitting for Dean. :)
aliaseverus
Oct. 2nd, 2007 06:37 pm (UTC)
Awww that's so cute! Poor, poor woobie Dean! And poor, poor, dead Sammy when Dean finds out about the pics!

Very cute.
astri13
Oct. 2nd, 2007 08:33 pm (UTC)
And poor, poor, dead Sammy when Dean finds out about the pics!

Hee. True, he will wish he only had chicken pox to worry about. :) Thank you.
girlfan1979
Oct. 2nd, 2007 06:53 pm (UTC)
Awww!

That is completely adorable. Poor SamnDean.

astri13
Oct. 2nd, 2007 08:33 pm (UTC)
Thank you muchly. I`m glad you liked it. :)
(Deleted comment)
astri13
Oct. 2nd, 2007 08:40 pm (UTC)
I knew it! Heh, the title kind of gave it away as well as Sam's insistence that no one *did* this to Dean. But so cute, poor squirmy boy in mits.

I could just picture him in writing it. :) Because I so wanted them to have the banter, I kinda sacrifised the secret at the end. *g*

And oh Sammy, the blackmail material is endless

But I fear Dean`s revenge will be merciless. :)
Thank you muchly.
(Deleted comment)
astri13
Oct. 3rd, 2007 11:31 am (UTC)
was how it was referred to as "the physical transformation". LOL

Heh. I remember the chicken pox too and it almost felt like one. :)
iamstealthyone
Oct. 3rd, 2007 12:17 am (UTC)
Cute ficlet! Poor Dean and his affliction.

Favorite lines:

"Maybe she thought you were hot?" he offered. This at least is something Dean shouldn't feel the need to argue with.

*snickers*

Sam figures this is probably not a good time to tell Dean that earlier, when Dean was sleeping, Sam has snapped a few pictures with his camera phone.

LOL!

Sam inclines his head to Dean's hands, clad in thick woollen gloves which Sam has taped shut all around Dean's wrists to keep him from scratching.

I love this image, and of course Sam would have to resort to doing this to keep Dean from scratching. Dean would be such a sneaky little kid about the whole thing. *g*
astri13
Oct. 3rd, 2007 12:22 am (UTC)
I love this image, and of course Sam would have to resort to doing this to keep Dean from scratching. Dean would be such a sneaky little kid about the whole thing. *g*

I think grown-ups are the worse kids in situations like this. *g* And the idea of poor Dean with his hands all taped in kinda cracked up. :)
Thank you muchly. So glad you liked it.
janissa11
Oct. 3rd, 2007 01:48 am (UTC)
Heeee! Aw, poor Deano! And Sammy cracked me right up. *laughing* BOYS!
astri13
Oct. 3rd, 2007 11:29 am (UTC)
Thank you muchly. Yup, Sam at least found the humor in the situation. But I`m thinking Dean`s revenge will be swift and without mercy. :)
lita_of_jupiter
Oct. 3rd, 2007 02:03 am (UTC)
Poor Sammy had to resort to appealing to Dean's ego
in order to try to convince him it wasn't a curse!
and Sam would so get pictures and send them around...
but if Dean was in his place there would have been a
poster ordered or something!
astri13
Oct. 3rd, 2007 11:30 am (UTC)
but if Dean was in his place there would have been a
poster ordered or something!


Hee. Now I imagine huge billboards featuring a chicken-pox-inflicted Sam. :) Thank you.
willoweese
Oct. 3rd, 2007 08:06 am (UTC)
This was so very cute. I loved it!
astri13
Oct. 3rd, 2007 11:30 am (UTC)
Yay, that means it worked. :) Thank you muchly.
(Deleted comment)
astri13
Oct. 22nd, 2007 01:00 pm (UTC)
Heh. Thanks.
a_phoenixdragon
Jun. 8th, 2008 06:57 am (UTC)
*Laughs*

*Shakes head*

Awesome...

*hugs*
( 18 have dazzled me — Dazzle me )

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